If They Accept My Membership...

I have always thought that the idea of a mile high club was interesting, but not really because of the sex. No, more as a logistical exercise.

Sex is always going to be interesting to me, it's just that there's a time and a place. One of the times that it is not the place, is in an aeroplane toilet. I am challenged even turning around in the tiny space. The idea of turning someone else on and then being able to do something about it - seems ridiculous.

I thought it had to be the purview of the rich and shameless. First class must have the palatial digs to fool around in. This is the secret to justifying the brain-bending prices of the first class ticket. If you fly up the pointy end, the toilets are huge and filled with willing talent.

Well punters, there's somewhere else. On a 747.400, there's one down the back that wraps around the side of the loo next to it. In aeroplane toilet architectural terms, it's freakin' enormous. That's where the plebs are getting it on, I reckon. Not enough room to swing a cat but certainly enough to get a little... oh, I'm sorry. There were so many bad gags around "the rear" of the plane I was trying to avoid. I was inevitably going to fall down somewhere.