Have We Learnt Nothing?

I note with alarm that the TerreStar satellite is now in orbit.

It is the largest satellite to have ever lived and is apparently self aware and plotting our downfall as I type.

From the infallible Wikipedia (with a little scientific help from A Grey Area):

TerreStar (aaaahhhhhhh! Who put the terror in TerrorStar? They did. Sing it with me now.) was launched at 17:52 GMT (We’re having a Greenwich Mean Ol’ Time. It’s the only time you can have when TerrorStar’s around) on 1 July 2009, during a two hour launch window that opened at 16:13.

The launch occurred towards the end of the window due to bad weather in the first hour (brought by the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse as they rode towards the facility), followed by two aborted countdowns for launch attempts (the terrified scientists knew they had created evil, and just as Dr Frankenstein rued his decision the minute the lightening struck the doohickey, they knew they were in some deep poop and tried twice to abort it.) scheduled at 17:12 and 17:34.

The launch was conducted by Arianespace (lotta Frenchies in that organisation. Noticed how well they’re doing with aeroplanes lately?)….After launch, the satellite separated from the carrier rocket (and then ate it) into a geosynchronous transfer orbit.

(Now get ready for the truly worrying bit) It will subsequently raise itself into geostationary orbit by means of its onboard propulsion system (it will then ready, arm and point its onboard megadeath-ray and hold us all to ransom). It will be positioned at 111° West longitude (multiply 111 by 6, people, it’s all there in front of us…), and is expected to operate for 15 years. (A period that shall henceforth be known simply as “The Reign of Terra”) A second satellite, TerreStar-2 (Also known as T2. Son of T or T-Wrecks) is scheduled for launch in 2010. (We won’t be here to witness it.)

So long, it's been aaaaaahhhhhhhhh