Socks and the City

There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of half things we don’t know.

It is almost impossible these days to come across true innovation. Most that appears fresh to us is merely the sharpening of a preceding idea - a development of a well established principle. It is truly stunning to see something come out of the void.





When it does, it bites you on the bum and it yells “Look at me! I am born of raw invention. I am a pure, unadulterated flight of creativity. I am man’s indomitable, unfettered imagination given shape.”

From out of the wasteland, I present to you:

Half–Sockin’.

(The background music in your head for this unveiling should be 'Never Stop the Body Rock' from the Electric Boogaloo soundtrack. [The phrase Up-Rockin! replaced by Half-Sockin!])

It’s more than just ‘Getting around the house casual style before both slippers are located.’

It’s a statement beyond refinement. When you do this, you are announcing to the world that you are an independent axiom-buster, ready to cross artistic and aesthetic lines. You are broadcasting, at ankle height, that:

You won’t be tied down to the fascistic expectations of the ‘manlady’.

You won’t take the thought hate-crimes of the fashionistas.

Through your fearless innovation, a standard item of clothing has reached a new level of utility by being used for a subtly different purpose than the one it was designed for.

I hear you ask, “Nick, how do these quantum leaps in societal behaviour happen?”

And I answer you, “I’m not sure. But as it must have been when they went from bronze to teflon, from steam to lightly-pressed, from unsliced to sliced, it is better if someone is there to document it. Later, great minds can ponder the import of the evidence.”

History

“You’re a heel with soul.” Churchill to Wing Commander Botherington-Smythe (Found Half-Socking through the MOD during the Battle of Britain’s final hours. Desperate times, desperate measures.)

It was accidentally introduced to me by Gooby (Rare live action shot included above. I decided to try it out. Incredible) who’s been doing it for a long time.

I was blissfully unaware that I was in the company of such revolutionary innovation, and his girlfriend must have been too. She walked past him and asked what the hell was going on with his socks.

His explanation was intriguing and illuminating. One of those moments of apotheosis.

To quote 2001: A Space Odyssey, “Something… wonderful.”

“My toes need to be kept warm, my heels don’t need that much attention and it allows for more grip on the tiles. Also, I’m not wearing out the heel of the sock when I’m walking around the house”

It’s more than just a practical second use for the sock. It has the feeling of zeitgeist change.

There’s no fence sittin’ when you’re half sockin’ people.

It’s another half socked country out there. Wear it if you dare.