08 May 2008

Not a Piercing Observation

"Under new laws to be introduced into State Parliament, it will be illegal for anyone under 16 to have their genitals or nipples pierced, and they will need their parent's permission for all other body piercings." ABC Today

Not far enough.

If you are involved with animals, food preperation or the public in any capacity, all facial piercings, except ears, are to become illegal. If you have lip piercings that make you hard to understand, or liable to dribble into my ham sandwich, they are to be outlawed. If you have eyebrow rings that get caught in your sunglasses/hat/jumper/headset, they are illegal from tomorrow. If you have a tongue piercing that you continually need to fiddle with, particularly by rolling your tongue and catching it between your two (badly cleaned) front teeth, it will be removed with pliers.

Oh and a tip for you here kids. I know that the teenage years are rough, and your skin can be a nightmare. You will come out the other side and you'll be slightly less gut-churningly repelent than you are now though. But in the mean time - You know that piercing that you put just above your top lip on one side? That one just like the ugly girl from Atomic Kitten? The one you fought so long and hard with your Mum about? The one that is showing how individual you are and really sticking it to 'the system'? Yeah... that just looks like another blind pimple on your rotten little head.

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